Tara 1, sticks (not enough)

I'm not completely stupid, you know. Now that TOWFM has re-entered, I've worked out I no longer need to pester the ones-who-have-my-morning-slipper for my breakfast and can just get on with waking him up and getting him out of his pit (well, actually it's not a pit - it's up near the ceiling but you know what I mean). I think he might have forgotten the routine though, because it took me more than a few goes and assistance from the-one-who's-beard-appears-to-be-getting-shorter-rather-than-longer (I'm still winning in the white hair stakes though) to get him up.
I'm running in my new stick at the moment - if you don't run them in then I've read in 'What Stick?' magazine (comes out every month and comprehensively reviews all the new sticks on the market) that a little warning light pops up, so I'll have to treat it carefully for the first few walks - no chewing either, that invalidates the warranty! Taking it in the water is only limited to particularly muddy spots, but this particular make and model (the Erlestoke 2000 Sport) seems to malfunction and float off down the stream with me in hot pursuit.
I'm doing a bit of research on human behaviour at the moment and what I can't understand is why when you step on them by mistake they don't go all submissive like we dojes do - to test this i managed to strategically place my foot under the clodhopper of TOWFM and did the usual routine when the inevitable happened. Then, when I trod on him a little while later, he didn't seem to play the game by the same rules. So I'm just going to have to ignore the label they have so kindly placed on my head (I do so like a bit of decoration) and stare at them for even longer during the course of the evening to see if I can figure these humans out.....