Tara 0, Hitchhikers 1

Two jungle expeditions today! The first one was when the grass was very wet so i got soaked and kept sneezing to get the droplets out of my nose. I took on the walk with me the one-who-now-appears-to-be-back-at-home-all-day and the-one-with-the-new-green-noisy-thing which he pushes up and down the lawn and they seemed to think it was funny when i kept doing a very high trot to avoid the worst of the waves of grass. I definitely need a machete or some kind of weapon (perhaps i can get something off the Boss that's big and noisy and goes down well with the foreigners) as there are creatures just waiting for me to come along to hitch a ride! Today i had to be rescued from a big slug which had presumed to come along on my walk, stuck to my leg. In fact, the sticky stuff is still there as the one-who-gave-me-two-biscuits-when-she-went-out said something about bargepoles and wild horses not dragging (they do say some funny things these humans) and wouldn't touch it (or me). Must be more vigilent tomorrow, these slugs are worse then homers.
They do have a bit of a funny idea about what food is in this house. I wait patiently in the kitchen whilst the one-who-always-prepares-the-food was cutting some interesting smelling things up but when she flipped me a piece (i think she was impressed as always by the fact that i can keep my concentration for so long and by the long drools i can make) it wasn't food at all - just something which looked like a crunchy thing i've found, tried and discarded in the flowerbed. Yeuch!