Tara 0, Dalmations 1 too many

Not sure i want to come here again - had the most traumatic experience yesterday! Just crossing the road outside the pub with TOWFM when there IT was....a Damnation! Flashbacks came into my head immediately - i remember these white Things with black spots, one attacked me when i was likkle. Well of course i wasn't going anywhere near this one - i'm not stupid, you know. Give me a homer or a pendle anytime (or a bikker actually). So i stayed put, TOWFM carried on, not really being sensitive to the threat in the situation and there we were, in the middle of the road, me digging in and trying to go into reverse (i can do reverse when the situation is desperate, contrary to popular opinion) TOWFM with his arm nearly dislocated from its socket as he realised i wasn't going forwards and the Damnation leaping up and down on the pavement opposite. I used the Collar-Eject option (all red collars have them, you know) so so got myself out of danger with TOWFM following in hot pursuit. What a narrow escape! Anyway I've been on Damnation-patrol in the garden ever since, making sure i have a good bark at the big black and white things just in case they turn out to be Damnations too.
And of that wasn't too much excitement for the week, i've been valeted too! They kept mentioning something about a chap called Dan Druff being there at the valeting too but i didn't see him. Mind you, i was treating them to my crinkly-ears-smile-and-look-daft face at the time so maybe i just didn't notice him. Part two of the valeting was my leaning-tower-of pisa-trick; i find it always helps to get a good lean onto the hand of anyone who is valeting my ear, and the odd grunting noise during the process helps keep them calm and attentive too. Usually also gets me an extra bikker.